Don't you love that person who always says "YES" to every request? While we all try to be that person, it's not always the healthiest modus operandi.
No matter the time of year - we seem to be getting more and more busy, and for many, the advent of the holiday season can evoke an array of emotions, including feelings of being overwhelmed. Preparing dishes, shopping, parties, family, performances and more - can feel like too much to manage.
Perhaps you’re the one who makes those special decorations that everyone loves or the food dish that's requested for seemingly every party, (in San Antonio, think tamales.)
Or maybe you’re the one who always picks up family from the airport. The requests to do more during an already event-filled time of year can feel like a lot to juggle, especially on top of normal, day-to-day obligations.
But even during non-holiday seasons, workplace demands, family plans, commitments to friends and colleagues and even recreational choices that we love, can cause a feeling of over taxing ourselves.
It’s important to remember that just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should, and it’s okay to say no. The situation can be as big as a business decision or as small as agreeing to babysit for the grandkids. However, that’s often easier said than done, so here are some tips to help empower you the next time you need to say no:
- If your schedule is full, saying “no” guards your priorities. If you agree to do something that you don’t really want to or don't have ample time to complete, something that’s important to you must get booted off your list. So, you might view saying no as a way to say yes to your important commitments.
- You don’t owe an explanation. We often feel as though we can’t say no unless we have a good excuse. That’s not true. If you don’t have the capacity or desire to commit to something, you can respectfully say no without offering an excuse or explanation. It’s not a negative reflection on your character.
- Keep it simple and courteous. You can be kind and firm at the same time. For example, “I can’t add anything else to my calendar this month, but it means a lot that you thought of me.” Or you might try proposing an alternative, such as “I share your enthusiasm; thank you for asking me! While I can’t do X, I’m able to do Y.”
Team member Rae B, is a long-time part of the Hidden Valley family. Born and raised right in the park, she has a unique perspective to share Hidden Valley and San Antonio inside info.